Taichung Armed Forces General Hospital

When your child cries, throws a tantrum, or has an emotional meltdown,
are you the “Stop crying right now” type, or the “Do whatever you want” type?

On the morning of April 18, Major Liu, Chuan-Wen, our Psychological Counseling Officer, delivered an insightful parenting workshop at the Taiping Sports Center—showing us that:

● Emotions are not the problem.
●Not knowing how to handle them is.

First, understand this:
How parents respond to emotions deeply shapes how children learn to manage theirs.
As psychologist John Gottman emphasizes:
“The key lies in how adults respond to children’s emotions.”
Children don’t just listen to what you say—they learn from how you handle emotions.

What kind of parent are you?
●Emotion-Dismissing: Distracts the child to stop the crying
●Emotion-Disapproving: Forbids crying and demands toughness
●Permissive: Offers comfort but sets no boundaries
●Emotion Coaching:
Accept emotions + set boundaries + guide problem-solving

The goal is not to “eliminate emotions”, but to “teach children how to live with them”. A Practical “5-Step Emotion Coaching Method”, next time your child is overwhelmed, try this:

I.Awareness
“I see that you’re angry. I know you’re hurting.”
II.Connection
Every emotional moment is a chance to connect and support your child’s development
III.Listening
Get down to their level, ask what happened—no judgment
IV.Labeling
Help them name their feelings: anger, worry, sadness, frustration
Problem-Solving
“Let’s figure this out together.”
☆Key Reminders
You don’t need to be a “Perfect Parent”, but you do need “Quality Presence”.
Manage your own emotions first—be your child’s role model
Use “I-messages”,
☆“I feel…because…, I hope…”.

Ex: “I feel worried because you’re yelling, and I hope we can talk calmly about what’s going on.”

☆Accept imperfection—in yourself and your child
“Emotions” are not meant to be suppressed, they are meant to be seen, understood and guided. When you begin to change how you respond, your child’s emotions will gradually become more stable—and more resilient.